Sex without intercourse? Really? Is it even sex? Is it just as pleasurable as conventional sex? These are questions that would come to someone’s mind when we talk about sex that does not involve intercourse. These may begin with a foundational question though- why would someone even like to indulge in non-penetrative sex? In this blog, we will do a deep dive to answer these questions, and find out more about enjoying sex without intercourse.
Sex and intercourse
First of all, we must acknowledge that sex is not just about intercourse. We often equate having sex with penetration even though that is not the reality. This definition not only upholds a heterosexual approach to sex, but it is also a tiny fraction of the types of pleasurable sexual experiences that you can enjoy. Limiting sex to just intercourse also limits your creativity and halts your exploration on the journey of pleasurable intimacy.
Sex is a multi-sensory activity that arouses you biologically, chemically and on a psychological level. It is more than just the act of entering each other’s bodies. Not everyone can indulge in exhaustive physical intimacy in their later stages of life, however, that does not imply that they don’t want to indulge in sexual activities at all. Then, what should an older couple in love do? Through the course of this blog, we discuss a few pointers to help you if you are looking to engage in sex without intercourse.
Why you should try sex without intercourse?
There are a large number of people, especially seniors, who face problems in penetrative sex due to varied reasons. These reasons range from medical ailments, old age pertaining difficulties, anxiety issues to performance pressure, excessive use of drugs etc. Therefore, if you have limited your idea of sex to just penetration alone, you are missing out on a host of pleasure-inducing activities with your partner.
How to have sex without penetration?
Always remember, the most important sexual organ in your body is not between your legs, it is between your ears. Yes, the most important sexual organ is the Brain. Everything about sex begins in the brain, including the chemical reactions that cause arousal in the first place. Thus, no matter what method you are employing to engage in sex, use your brain effectively for maximum satisfaction. So, let’s discuss these helpful techniques and methods:.
Oral Stimulation: You and your partner can indulge in oral activities, that may be pleasurable for both. This does not imply that you solely focus on genitalia, a body has multiple erogenous zones, including ones around the ears, neck and waist.
Physical Stimulation: Touch is the most common stimulant involved in arousal. One can focus on engaging some of the 24 nerves placed all over the body (according to the Kama Sutra), which when touched appropriately can enhance the experience of love-making.
Massage: Not only does a massage relieve trapped tension in the body and the touch factor may lead to mutual arousal, but it also makes one familiar and comfortable with your partner’s unclothed body.
Material Aid for Sex (or sex toys): You could opt to go this route based on your and your partners comfort level. There is a variety of such options legally available in the market, and they offer intimate stimulation without the need for penetration.
Kissing and Cuddling: It may sound orthodox, but don’t underestimate the effectiveness of this time-old method of pleasure. It not only may incite other sexual acts, but it will also help build a strong bond of affection with your partner. Both kissing and cuddling, offer the stimulus of physical touch without explicitly indulging in intercourse.
Read Also : kamasutra Tips for seniors
If you have been looking to spice it up in the bedroom without going the traditional route of intercourse, you now know that there are ways to do so. The aforementioned were only some options but there is a much larger set of alternatives available to lovers of all ages. Apart from information already available on the world wide web, it is suggested to talk to a sex therapist, or medical practitioner to understand other methods of pleasure you could safely partake in. This is especially necessary if you or your partner are differently-abled..
A relationship beyond sex
Many a time, affectionate touch and intimacy between the couple mean more than penetrative sex itself. You may have retired from your job but that does not mean you should retire from enjoying physical pleasure. And despite the large popularity that intercourse has gained over the past five decades owing to the advent of its media representation, there remain many ways to express love besides just sexual acts.
Once in a while, try gifting flowers to your partner, make food together, go on a planned date or a holiday together, do gardening and go out for a movie etc. These activities not just help in maintaining a healthy relationship, they also lead to better compatibility during sex. Like everything else, sex too is just one aspect of a relationship, so be cognisant of boosting your relationship in other areas too.
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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
How do you love someone without sex?
One must remember, sex is just a small part of your love life. With age, there is a gradual decrease in sexual acts but it does not mean love fades away too. Show your support to your partner, share your thoughts, express your love and most importantly make it known that you love them and care for them.
What are sexless relationships?
Many a time, with age or due to other reasons, couples go through a decrease in their sexual activities and sometimes impose celibacy as well. Such relationships may be called sexless, however, that does not imply it is a bad relationship. Everyone has a choice, and some do exercise this choice to opt for sexless relationships.
How do you show affection?
One can show affection by presenting something valuable to a partner. Once in a while, sing a song for your partner, celebrate birthdays and other life events and most importantly tell your partner that you value their relationship.
